Contemplating Carl: May/June, 2011
John 1:5 says, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” This verse has been a constant comfort through out my life. It is that light at end of the tunnel that compels me to keep moving forward in hope.
There is no doubt that life can be difficult. There is no doubt that in life there will be obstacles that need to be overcome. Even when those obstacles seem insurmountable and we feel utterly defeated there is something in us that thrusts us forward. That force, or whatever you want to call it, is the light that shines in defiance of the darkest nights. And as long as you keep your gaze on that light you see hope. You have hope. You can see the end.
The past six years of my life have been an arduous journey, one of tenuous struggles and marvelous triumphs. But when I look back I see the faithfulness of God. I see how God has brought me this far. I see how friends and family have supported me through prayer, encouragement, and finances as a finished my B.A. in Bible College. I see moments when I have stepped out in faith as I pursue the calling God has placed on my life. I see so many wonderful things, even the obstacles that I have overcome now seem like monuments to God’s faithfulness. My past is victorious when illuminated by the light. As wondrous as it is to reminisce I know God is calling me to move forward, calling me to continue on the path he has placed me on.
To be honest, this past season I felt like giving up. I felt defeated by life. I took my gaze off of the light and felt like I was being swallowed whole by the darkness that encroached upon me from all sides. It is when life seems darkest that the light has the potential to shine brightest. Even the most minuscule amount of light penetrates like a finely focused laser. Every time I have come to that place of exasperation God has sent someone or something to turn my focus back to the light.
So as I travel the path that God has laid before me, school, ministry, pastoring, incarnating the light to others, I thank God for his faithfulness. I thank God for my friends and family who support me. I thank God for the obstacles that show me how dependent I am on God. I thank God for the darkness because it magnifies the intensity of the light.
It is in this spirit of thankfulness that I thank you as well. God has partnered us together on this journey and has shown me his faithfulness through your faithfulness. So in the midst of the dark nights of life remember to fix your gaze upon the light and we will walk this path following God together. Because we are partnered together, please do not hesitate to let me know how I can be praying for and supporting you as well (Cnotebrown@gmail.com). Together we continue to incarnate the light and shine brightly in a world that thinks darkness is the norm.
The road is long and narrow, but we rejoice because we have the light. We rejoice because the light shines. We rejoice because the darkness will never overcome the light.
Miracles Abounding in the
Normalcy of Life
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| My little sister just had her second child; meet Tianah |
The day before I woke up and got ready for church like any other Sunday. As I bent down to pick up my shoes my back went out, which was odd because for the last few months my back has been rather good. After the service began I had to sit down for worship because my back was in so much pain. During the service I remember praying, “God, I need to hear from you.” At the end of the service pastor Mark stood up and began to call out specific things that God was wanting to heal that morning. The first thing he said was, “God is wanting to heal someone who has intense back pain, specifically in their lower back.” I raised my hand and was instructed to go over to the side to receive prayer. A couple from the church began to pray for my back. I felt my back begin to tense up and spasm, then the pain was gone. I don’t know why but I began to cry. The heaviness on my life that I felt was lifted and I began to hope. “Carl, if the pain comes back it is the Devil trying to attack you, just rebuke the pain,” said the husband. Later that night the pain came back very intensely. I prayed and rebuked the pain. I went to sleep, got woken up by news that my sister was in labor, and when I got up the next morning the pain was gone. Ever since that night my back has been pain free. I am not saying that God caused my back to go out, but he sure did use the moment to bring healing into my life. I felt as if it was God shining his light in my direction just to let me know he is still there.
Branches on the Vine
John 15:5 says, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” This is one of my favorite verses. First, the helplessness we have outside of God, and second because of the interconnectedness that the whole Church has to Jesus and through Jesus to each other.
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| The sun setting on the drive up to Phoenix, Arizona for the Vineyard National Conference |
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